PEER PROOF
Everybody feels peer pressure.
People want to be liked. They want to fit in. They don’t want to disappoint or lose their friends. Feeling peer pressure, whether it’s spoken or not, is normal. The idea that “everybody is doing it” sometimes causes people to leave their better judgment behind.
Everybody can also resist peer pressure.
Of course, when it comes to teen drinking, everybody isn’t doing it. In fact, the vast majority of teens don’t drink, both in Tooele County and nationwide. Saying “No” to alcohol can be easy, or at least easier than many teens believe. It just takes a little practice and knowing the right way to do it. Find out how by clicking the topics, below.
The secret to saying, “No.”
There are many ways to say, “No” and resist peer pressure, but studies have proven one to be more effective than the others. This is it:
Be polite, assertive and don’t make excuses. Just say that you don’t drink and that you don’t want to. Simple as that.
Be polite, assertive and don’t make excuses. Just say that you don’t drink and that you don’t want to. Simple as that.
How it works:
Your friend asks, “Hey, you want a drink?”
You say, “No, thanks. I don’t drink.”
Your friend asks, “Really? Why not?”
You say, “It’s just not my thing.”
Your friend asks, “Have you tried it?”
You say, “No, and I don’t really want to.”
Your friend says, “It’s a lot of fun. Everybody does it.”
You say, “I don’t. Sorry.”
End of discussion. (In fact, in many cases, the discussion would have ended after “No, thanks. I don’t drink.”) You’ve just beaten peer pressure, and because you’ve done it in a polite, confident, matter-of-fact way, the odds are very good that you haven’t lost the friendship or respect of any of your peers. In fact, because you frankly stood up for yourself, you may have gained more of their respect.
You say, “No, thanks. I don’t drink.”
Your friend asks, “Really? Why not?”
You say, “It’s just not my thing.”
Your friend asks, “Have you tried it?”
You say, “No, and I don’t really want to.”
Your friend says, “It’s a lot of fun. Everybody does it.”
You say, “I don’t. Sorry.”
End of discussion. (In fact, in many cases, the discussion would have ended after “No, thanks. I don’t drink.”) You’ve just beaten peer pressure, and because you’ve done it in a polite, confident, matter-of-fact way, the odds are very good that you haven’t lost the friendship or respect of any of your peers. In fact, because you frankly stood up for yourself, you may have gained more of their respect.
Why assertive works better than other ways of saying, “No.”
By confidently and matter-of-factly stating that you don’t or won’t do something, there’s no room for argument. Compare the conversation above to the ones below.
Your friend asks, “Hey, you want a drink?”
You say, “No. My parents would kill me.”
Your friend says, “How will they find out?”
Now you have to debate about whether your parents will ever know, or you just have to assertively say, “No” like in the example above.
Your friend asks, “Hey, you want a drink?”
You say, “No. I can’t. I’ve got a big test in the morning.”
Your friend says, “Well, don’t get drunk then. Just have one drink.”
Now you have to keep making excuses about why alcohol will affect your performance. Plus, you have to make up another excuse the next time this situation arises.
Your friend asks, “Hey, you want a drink?”
You say, “I’d rather go to a movie.”
Your friend says, “Oh, we’ll go to the movies after.”
Now you either have to explain why you want to go to the movies now, or you need to try another way of refusing the drink.
Your friend asks, “Hey, you want a drink?”
You say, “No. My parents would kill me.”
Your friend says, “How will they find out?”
Now you have to debate about whether your parents will ever know, or you just have to assertively say, “No” like in the example above.
Your friend asks, “Hey, you want a drink?”
You say, “No. I can’t. I’ve got a big test in the morning.”
Your friend says, “Well, don’t get drunk then. Just have one drink.”
Now you have to keep making excuses about why alcohol will affect your performance. Plus, you have to make up another excuse the next time this situation arises.
Your friend asks, “Hey, you want a drink?”
You say, “I’d rather go to a movie.”
Your friend says, “Oh, we’ll go to the movies after.”
Now you either have to explain why you want to go to the movies now, or you need to try another way of refusing the drink.
If “No” doesn’t work.
Sometimes a person might not take “No” for an answer. They’ll continue to hound you, or make fun of you, or threaten to stop being your friend. The best thing to do in those rare cases is just to walk away. Leave the situation if you can. If you honestly lose that friend or friends, who cares? If your entire relationship with that person hinges on whether or not you drink, what kind of friendship is it? Finding new friends is far easier than trying to recover from the damage caused by underage drinking.
Practice makes peer proof.
Being confident and assertive about what you want and don’t want to do doesn’t come naturally for everybody. If it makes you feel uncomfortable, you might need a little practice.
As corny as it sounds, practice saying “No” in the mirror. Stand up straight. Look yourself in the eyes, and say “No, thanks. I don’t drink.” You might be surprised at how persuasive it is. Plus, by practicing beforehand, you’ll know exactly what you want to say if you ever need to refuse a drink later.
With a little repetition, you’ll find that resisting peer pressure becomes much easier, and not just about drinking. The exact same techniques work for refusing drugs, sex, tobacco—anything you don’t want to do.
As corny as it sounds, practice saying “No” in the mirror. Stand up straight. Look yourself in the eyes, and say “No, thanks. I don’t drink.” You might be surprised at how persuasive it is. Plus, by practicing beforehand, you’ll know exactly what you want to say if you ever need to refuse a drink later.
With a little repetition, you’ll find that resisting peer pressure becomes much easier, and not just about drinking. The exact same techniques work for refusing drugs, sex, tobacco—anything you don’t want to do.